Super Sonic Samba!
by Apollo Chungus
Summary: You get lost out in the woods, eat some mushrooms... Next thing you know, the sky's gone a thousand colours and things get very steamy and strange. (Set in some undetermined point in Sonic Boom)


"_Five days…"_

With a hand held up over his forehead, Sonic stared at the sun peeking through the countless leaves in the trees hanging above them and groaned wearily _"Five days since we had anything to eat…"_

"_Don't remind me, Sonic," _Tails advised while he tinker with a portable computer he'd invented shortly before they had to chase after Dr Eggman deep into the labyrinth-like woods. It had been roughly a week since that impromptu chase, and none of them knew how to get back home. _"I know it's awful and everything," _he continued as he tried his best to remain optimistic, _"but Knuckles and Amy have gone to try and get some food. They should find something eventually."_

The azure hedgehog's stomach growled like a goon voiced by a diarrhoea-stricken Steve Blum, leading him to declare with a moan _"I don't care. I need a snack, and I need it now." _He looked hurriedly around him, and soon came upon a pair of red mushrooms just beside the moss-ridden log he was resting his head on. He grinned madly, and lunged for one of them.

"_Sonic, no!", _the wide-eyed fox cried, but it was too late. His brother had already scoffed one of the shrooms, and didn't give a flying toss about the possible effects. _"Why'd you do that?!", _he asked in outraged concern, _"Those could be poisonous!"_

Sonic chuckled at the thought with a content pat of his belly as he picked up the other one, retorting _"They're too tasty to be poisonous, buddy. Now," _as he held it in front of Tails' face, _"are you gonna eat this? Or am I gonna have seconds?"_

As much as he hated himself for it, the two-tailed kitsune couldn't help but hunger for that delicious looking bit of fungi. With a squeak from his starving stomach, he snatched the mushroom out of the Blue Blur's hand and chowed it down in no time.

He braced himself for trouble, but found that he hadn't spilt his guts all over the floor. Smiling in relief, he sheepishly agreed _"You're right. It is tasty," _before the two brothers laughed at the whole mess. A few seconds later, however, their eyes went wide and things turned very strange.

For some reason unbeknownst to either of them, the sky turned green, then bright purple not too long afterwards, and then orange-brown plaid, which had a distinct smell of blueberry legal documents. The noisy aroma wafted into their ears, while the clanging barks of nearby Flickies buzzed into their nostrils with all the subtlety of a silent symphony with the volume turned all the way up.

"_Tails," _Sonic apprehensively mumbled, staring madly at what he assumed were wither his hands or two pairs of bandaged butterflies, _"What the heck's going on?"_

The young fox observed the battalion of singing watches on his arm for a moment or two before slurring _"It seems those mooshrums we ate were laced with summink…odd, I'm sorry. I thinke their effecting my abilitie 2 speak."_

At this point, the hedgehog looked towards his long-time friend and found a giant, three-foot-long chilli dog between his buddy's legs. This might've explained why he replied slowly _"Then don't say anything at all," _as he got to his knees and started devouring that thick, juicy piece of meat.

Tails felt the taste of fox cock bouncing across his taste buds like a helium-stuffed Pavarotti in a pinball machine, but protested to his multi-coloured brother _"Sonic, wh-whuht are u doin'?"_

"_Tails," _Sonic cuckooed, as he fondled the grey coconuts dangling just under the veiny sausage with a mad shine in his teeth, _"It's so delicious. Why not give it a go?"_

As if by command, the chilli dog lifted into the air until it curved the bell-end to be about an inch or so away from the half-krazed kitsune's face. He was hesitant to make contact, believing all this to be anatomically impossible, but when he saw that the head had morphed into the studly nipples of Knuckles the Echidna, he could resist no longer.

He wrapped his tongue around the pink nub and began to suckle on it with the same sort of ferocity Sonic was using to rub his giraffe of a phallus off the rest of the chilli dog. They groaned verily as mustard jam and ketchup marmite dribbled existentially down both of their fire hoses.

"_Ooh!"_

"_Lordy loo!"_

"_Bugger me!"_

"_Faster, Captain Planet!"_

And with that final introduction, lava falls of rainbows exploded forth from their jubilant junks. As displeased as they were to see the cocks of their dreams going back to normal, they were much more excited by the bulging muscles and perky nipples of the other Mobian.

To the tune of deeply-voiced sopranos singing Komm Susser Todd in a polka style, Sonic and Tails made out hotly as they fell into a pool of warm honey. A mass of blue and yellow muscles meshing, sweating and grinding like a bunch of Ace Attorney nerds whenever the words _possible localization _are mentioned, their literally forked tongues had a fencing match that Professor Layton and Inigo Montoya's lesbian lovechild would've been proud of.

Just as they were about to finish the duel with a giant robot blowing up and a heartbreaking revelation followed up by dozens of obnoxiously obtuse puzzles, the juicy fox tripped over a lingerie-glad meerkat and feel deep into the honey. This gave the Blue Blur a good, blind view of his brother's simply delectable arsehole.

Lubing his resurrected giraffe with the blood-red honey, Sonic plunged his plonker straight into the space between the glued-together heads of Phil Collins &amp; Norman Lovett and never looked back. He bucked his hips over and over as he went even deeper than Bob Dylan on a philosophical afternoon, his sweat escaping from his face in the form of little butterflies.

Tails huffed and puffed, grabbing the grass-like blades of snake that grew forth from the honey, when he noticed a portal appear before his sorely-underappreciated carrot. The portal seemed to lead to the bubble butt of the Blue Blur; it looked too good to be true. He thrust his ticker, and heard the ecstatic yodels of his best friend to let him know that it was indeed the truth.

So they began thrusting, bucking and cuming with greater unison than anything even the Five Children from Down the Lane could muster up, enraptured in an ocean of honey-lubed buttsex from now until the end of eternity. What heaven.

* * *

Or it was for them. As for Knuckles and Amy, who had just returned with a bag of fruit bought from a nearby market just a few feet away, it was something else altogether. Sonic was currently whacking off into the depths of a bee hive and laughing madly from the stings to his poor bugger, while Tails was ostensibly butt-raping a brown raccoon who looked to be crying from the pain of it all.

"_Er…what're they doing?", _the clueless 'chidna asked as he scratched his head at the bamboozling sight.

"_Guy stuff, Knuckles," _Amy wearily replied, taking as good a guess as any for a situation as meowing mad as this, before she led the muscular Mobian back to the market, _"Just leave them to it."_

They vowed never to speak of it again, even when Sonic was screaming about his hole-ridden willy and Tails was trying desperately to make up with the bitter raccoon. It was just too weird.


End file.
